A Perfect Love Story
A perfect love story. It would be soon be mine. It has to be. No excuse. Whatever I have written so far on my own are not perfect and may be described as sad, pathetic and at best, poignantly sweet, but not perfect. There are no magic. Some stories were made into movies, but later went straight to cable, without their moments on the big screen. They showed promising start but ended in rather sad notes. So I admit I am not a good writer. I struggled even stringing together a sentence that would start the story.
I pick up sometimes the old scripts that are now in tatters. I wanted to know in my anguish what went wrong. Will my limited intellect allow me to understand this or come to terms with what had happened so far? I patched some of them with my memories, stiched some of my favorite stories together with hope. I can’t get rid of the fact that I fail as a writer.
I read them again sometimes and remind myself that I will never write again. So the next love story is going to be perfect because I am not the writer. It is in much capable hands.
Would I find faults with the story? Would I read it with a mean critical eye? Can it really be perfect? Why would it be perfect?
So in those moments of doubt, the urge to write it on my own comes up.
``I think I will go out with that catholic,’’ I said.
``No, you shouldn’t,’’ N said.
``Why not? He’s really cute.’’ I said. And well-paid, which means I can get all those shoes, I continued in my mind.
``No, because you will feel guilty going out with a catholic and you will spend most of your time thinking miserably about what you have done. Then you will engage in pre-marital sex and feel even worse about yourself. He will later dump you and leave you devastated. And I have to come in and pick up the pieces,’’ N said in one breath.
I stared at N in disbelief with great annoyance. How did he come up with all that? Some kind of a prophet. Why would a person with a sound mind come up with all that?
I looked away, grudgingly, though I mentally called off the phone call I was hoping to make in the afternoon to schedule drinks so that I can wear my new dress.
``You should go out with the civil servant that I have earmarked for you,’’ N said.
Looking annoyed, ``I don’t think he wants to be earmarked and he is not a civil servant anymore. You know he quit?’’ My eyes narrowed.
``He doesn’t like you?’’
``No, he doesn’t. And I don’t like him either.’’ Super annoyed. It is one of the rare things in my life that is perfect. I don’t like him and he doesn’t like me. Perfect.
``How about AAAAA?’’
``Yes. He is perfect. Civil servant.’’ I said with sarcasm.
What has He earmarked for me?
I think of my stories, those scripts that are in tatters. They are not perfect because they are about coming of age, they are about growing up and why it is so difficult, and they are about falling in love and why they don’t last and yet they last forever. They are my stories, all mine, written by me, no matter how bad they are, no matter how heartbroken I had been.
Life could be as great as it could be. I know that before I got scared and cynical. Now, I just need Him and there is always a song.
Now
By John David Webster
Tonight, it's all black and white, The sky is so quiet But inside a battle’s raging wild. Why do I fight? Why do I fight Heaven's love? When all I need, is more of you in me
Now, I need you now More than the air I'm breathing Now, Yes I'm crying out from the depths of my inmost being. Now, come have your way with me. Yes, I need you now....
The dawn chases the dark, out of my heart, As tears of gladness roll. They wash over me, like the waves of the sea, Shouting out their hallelujahs
And I am free, with more of you in me
Now, I need you now More than the air I'm breathing. Now, Yes I'm crying out, from the depths of my inmost being. Now, come have your way with me. Stay close and never leave, Until you're the heart that beats, Inside of me
I need you now, I need you now, I'm crying out,more than the air I breathe
Yes I need you now, yes I'm crying out, And all I need...... Is more of you in me now
I need you now........ Yes I need you now.
There is more of you in me now.
I pick up sometimes the old scripts that are now in tatters. I wanted to know in my anguish what went wrong. Will my limited intellect allow me to understand this or come to terms with what had happened so far? I patched some of them with my memories, stiched some of my favorite stories together with hope. I can’t get rid of the fact that I fail as a writer.
I read them again sometimes and remind myself that I will never write again. So the next love story is going to be perfect because I am not the writer. It is in much capable hands.
Would I find faults with the story? Would I read it with a mean critical eye? Can it really be perfect? Why would it be perfect?
So in those moments of doubt, the urge to write it on my own comes up.
``I think I will go out with that catholic,’’ I said.
``No, you shouldn’t,’’ N said.
``Why not? He’s really cute.’’ I said. And well-paid, which means I can get all those shoes, I continued in my mind.
``No, because you will feel guilty going out with a catholic and you will spend most of your time thinking miserably about what you have done. Then you will engage in pre-marital sex and feel even worse about yourself. He will later dump you and leave you devastated. And I have to come in and pick up the pieces,’’ N said in one breath.
I stared at N in disbelief with great annoyance. How did he come up with all that? Some kind of a prophet. Why would a person with a sound mind come up with all that?
I looked away, grudgingly, though I mentally called off the phone call I was hoping to make in the afternoon to schedule drinks so that I can wear my new dress.
``You should go out with the civil servant that I have earmarked for you,’’ N said.
Looking annoyed, ``I don’t think he wants to be earmarked and he is not a civil servant anymore. You know he quit?’’ My eyes narrowed.
``He doesn’t like you?’’
``No, he doesn’t. And I don’t like him either.’’ Super annoyed. It is one of the rare things in my life that is perfect. I don’t like him and he doesn’t like me. Perfect.
``How about AAAAA?’’
``Yes. He is perfect. Civil servant.’’ I said with sarcasm.
What has He earmarked for me?
I think of my stories, those scripts that are in tatters. They are not perfect because they are about coming of age, they are about growing up and why it is so difficult, and they are about falling in love and why they don’t last and yet they last forever. They are my stories, all mine, written by me, no matter how bad they are, no matter how heartbroken I had been.
Life could be as great as it could be. I know that before I got scared and cynical. Now, I just need Him and there is always a song.
Now
By John David Webster
Tonight, it's all black and white, The sky is so quiet But inside a battle’s raging wild. Why do I fight? Why do I fight Heaven's love? When all I need, is more of you in me
Now, I need you now More than the air I'm breathing Now, Yes I'm crying out from the depths of my inmost being. Now, come have your way with me. Yes, I need you now....
The dawn chases the dark, out of my heart, As tears of gladness roll. They wash over me, like the waves of the sea, Shouting out their hallelujahs
And I am free, with more of you in me
Now, I need you now More than the air I'm breathing. Now, Yes I'm crying out, from the depths of my inmost being. Now, come have your way with me. Stay close and never leave, Until you're the heart that beats, Inside of me
I need you now, I need you now, I'm crying out,more than the air I breathe
Yes I need you now, yes I'm crying out, And all I need...... Is more of you in me now
I need you now........ Yes I need you now.
There is more of you in me now.
posted by eternal bough at 9:38 PM
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