Good Mood

``When is your church camp?'' N asked during lunch.

``Last week!''

``No wonder you are in such a good mood.''

``Oh really? I am in a good mood? I volunteered to XXX.''

``Oh wahhh...'' Then N broke into laughter. So terrible. I know it is unbelieveable. I am the devil. ``Ok, then I will get you that book by Josh McDowell for that.''

Last year church camp, I stayed in the hotel room most of the nights. I didn't get out to know people. It had been that way for many years. I am inward looking. I focus on myself. I read the bible to know how to resolve my issues, to eradicate the problems in my life. I wanted to serve but I was never ready. There are still so many problems, I had said. I am not ready, I had said.

``I don't think I can wait for all my problems to be resolved before I serve because I don't think they will be resolved. I will still have them. So the focus should change. I should read the bible in order to learn how to serve Him in whatever ministry I pick.'' I said. `` And something wonderful always happen during church camp. I got close to this person.''

``That's good. You guys have more things in common, more than you have with J,'' N said.

``J? Right.'' How did I get close to J? Perhaps I was a different person then.

Things change. Then, there are still things that wouldn't go away. There are questions still with no answers.

Someday I'll know why his face's still there when I am flipping pages of a good book.

Someday We'll Know
by New Radicals

90 miles outside chicago
Cant stop driving
I dont know why
So many questions
I need an answer
Two years later
Youre still on my mind
Whatever happened to emilia earhart
Who holds the stars up in the sky
Is true love once in a lifetime
Did the captain of the titanic cry
Chorus:
Someday well know
If love can move a mountain
Someday well know
Why the sky is blue
Someday well know
Why I wasnt meant for you
Does anybody know the way to atlantis
Or what the wind says when she cries
Im speeding by the place where I met you
For the 97th time tonight
(chorus)
Someday well know
Why samson loved delilah
One day Ill go
Dancing on the moon
Someday youll know
That I was the one for you
I bought a ticket to the end of the rainbow
I watched the stars crash in the sea
If I could ask God just one question
Why arent you here with me?
(chorus)
Someday well know
Why sampson loved delilah
One day Ill go
Dancing on the moon
Someday youll know
That I was the one for you
Postscript: seeing you in february was great
Cliches eventually all come true
Time heals all wounds
I went to get us our 9th drink
And you ran out the door with another guy
I woke up on the floor with my shoes on
A smile on my face and I didnt even care